The U.S. Slave Song Spirituals Choir, Summer 2013
I didn’t plan to begin this way. I am writing this morning
because I am not singing. This morning’s
choir practice for Encore Creativity at the Smithsonian was cancelled due to
the Government Shutdown. Waaah, boooo, disappointed
frown, I wanted to go to practice. I
really enjoy our weekly sessions, singing my lungs out with 142 other over-55
singers, and our wonderful director Jeanne Kelley. Not today.
I have not always been a choral singer. I sang in the Philomethian Street School
Choir in Chagrin Falls, Ohio, back when I was a kid. I remember a song I wrote in the 4th
grade was sung by our choir, a great honor. (The song was “Johnny Appleseed”,
co written with Karl Kuivinen,.) But after that I dropped out of
choir, and eventually learned to play the guitar and became a folk singer. Almost always a solo artist, with occasional standup
bass played by my friend David Jackson, and sometimes harmony with my pal Ann
Peabody. Mostly just me and my guitar.
My upbringing involved some fairly irresponsible behavior by
the adults around me, and I was mistrustful of authority from the get go. As a folk singer, I could go where I wanted
to go with the music. In a choir, I
would have to trust the director to choose the songs and the arrangements. I would have to trust my fellow singers to
make it come out right. The whole idea
made me a little nervous.
I also had well hidden doubts about my own voice. As a folk
singer, you are not compared to anyone (except maybe Joan Baez) and your
performance depends on how you move the audience. If you are a little rough around the edges,
well, that’s folk music. I had confidence in myself as an entertainer, but like
many people I doubted my own voice.
Despite my doubts, I even recorded a CD of original music, http://www.cdbaby.com/cd/janehurst
But there you have control over what
goes out into the air. In a choir you have to go with the group. Very different.
When my friend Patty retired and took up singing, both in
choirs and as a voice student, I said , “Oh, great!” But I really didn’t get it. Why did she want to do that? Sounded kind of dull to me, singing other people’s
songs in a group I have no musical control over. But Patty is a wise woman, and during a
difficult time in my life, got me to the Community Sing at the Levine School of
Music led by Ysaye Barnwell. http://www.vocalcommunity.com/BUILDING_A_VOCAL_COMMUNITY/Welcome.html
I’ll say more about the healing power of this music in a later post. But Ysaye’s choir was a transformative experience
for me. I was addicted.
And I learned to trust my choir director. Being in a choir is like being a baby
duckling, following whoever I am imprinted on. You must follow and keep your eyes on the
leader or you get lost easily. Ysaye was
a great “first leader” for me, because she never leaves us out to dry. She always leads us where we need to go. And
if we make a mistake, she gives you “the look”, a brief glance with a lifted
eyebrow. The worst part about ”the look” is it’s funny, and encourages you
to laugh at yourself, and you can’t start giggling in the middle of a
song. That would be rude. Better to experience the joy of learning,
including the mistakes, and keep singing!
Singing with the Community Sing at Levine, we sing songs in
the African American tradition, which I just love. I like them all. Singing in the Smithsonian Encore Chorale http://www.encorecreativity.org/, where
we sing a more traditional repertoire, I also learned to get past the limits of
my own musical taste, which is pretty wide to begin with. To my surprise, I have enjoyed singing
Gershwin, Irving Berlin, and Gilbert and Sullivan, which is hysterically
funny! Visualize a choir of 150 or so
over-55 singers, “We are dainty little fairies, dancing in a fairy ring.” Not exactly.
So if trust is my theme, how do I deal with my emotions of
loss and anger about the government shutdown that cancelled my choir practice? I am distressed, because regular singing is a big part of maintaining my peace of
mind. I have been sidelined for several months due to illness from walking, my other mental health activity. I had better find time today to
pick up my guitar and sing. And trust
that what looks like a disaster for democracy will work out for some higher
purpose.
In today’s world, trust is lacking. At the pharmacy, waiting for my prescription,
I tried to commiserate with the woman sitting next to me whose insurance
company had turned down her refill. “These insurance companies can drive you
nuts, can’t they?" I said. She turns to
me and says with a sneer, “It’s the fault of Obamacare and everyone who voted for him!” Taken aback, I say, “That’s not true.
Somebody told you that, but it’s not true.”
She ignores the big corporation that is controlling her health care, and
the corporations that control the news she absorbs, and turns on me, her fellow
citizen, someone she does not know and already mistrusts. This is not good. It is no way to have a democracy function.
For democracy to work, the voters need to trust one another.
Maybe I did not vote for the person who was elected, but I trust my fellow
citizens who did vote for this person that they had a reason to do so. Because I believe in democracy I acknowledge
that person’s right to govern. And we go forward from there.
Our leaders and our media, mostly on the right, have sowed
seeds of mistrust in the last few years by demonizing opponents and refusing to
acknowledge the leadership of our duly elected President. I see this as undermining the trust among
citizens on which a republic stands. I do not mean to attack right back at
them, falling into the same bad habit. But I must speak my truth as I see it.
What I do ask for is a willingness to let our elected leaders
lead, and a willingness to co-operate when we are singing in the same choir. This benefits all of us. It all starts with trust.
Link to the Community
Sing in action: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UKv2--mk6gM (I’m in this one, green blouse, front row.)
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